Saturday, August 31, 2013

310813

If only they decorate the whole town with Malaysia flag (since it's Merdeka weekend) like how they did so during GE13..

I am not surprised that many told me they are not aware that Merdeka Day is here. Sad isn't it?

Nevertheless, happy Merdeka and pray that God will continue to bless this country.

anyway, just finished one assignment from my STM part time course. I am so moving on from it, praying for the best as I hand in this. Thank God I able to persevere through it. It's never easy to work and study.. it's killing me inside sometimes :(

Even after I hand in this, there's another one waiting on my table. Oh great, more brain cracking time ..

Past few days have been quiet nevertheless. There are days I feel terrible inside. I admit I missing someone so badly but I can't say a thing because it's gonna ruin our friendship. I admit some matters around me are just frustrating but I can't say a thing because I feel some people are too ego to hear me out. That's why silence has been my best friend lately, although it's killing me inside but I trying to stay strong and try not to rely on my own strength. It's hard for me to share to anyone because of such uncertainty in life itself.

That's my story this year, hasn't it? I felt God many times told me not to rely on my strength. Still learning that lesson God. Still learning. And in these lessons, I learn to trust in You and not lose hope.

Recently, I spend some quiet time and really being convicted by God about my imperfection I wish I can cry my eyeballs out for repentance but somehow the tears was so hard to come out. Perhaps in my heart, I really put my hands up high and said yea, it was really my fault, my own doing.. not blaming anyone, anything. This whole thing of making right before God can be a heart breaking and tearing process but it does make you feel better.

I would never say my walk with God has been superb at times but i know He never leave me.

Recently, my house has been hosting few visitors. I realized how God has used me and this house.

I remember praying that my house can be a blessing and it has so far. Ok, my house is not a bungalow looking building but at least I want it to be a blessing to those who in need.

September just around the corner. Lord, help me survive through the storms.

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